The Turkey in the Kiln story...

Several years ago, I worked at a school where my personal kiln was used as the school kiln.  Because I taught elementary, the powers that be decided to put it in the middle school art room - to be safer.  Well, the midle school teacher heard about cooking a turkey in a kiln.  Now, this was a very old kiln, and only had a cone kiln-sitter.  No ramping, or holding, just turn on low, medium or high, and away it would go until 1800 degrees when the cone would melt enough to cut the kiln off.  So, this teacher puts a turkey in the kiln in the evening, turns on the kiln, and goes home.  At 5 am or so, the fire alarm went off.  Well, the turkey was a charred, smelly smoldering mess.  The entire school, especially that end, reeked.  A teacher in the midst of morning sickness moved to a classroom far far away.  For weeks, even pulling a tissue from a box caused a revisit of the smell. 
Needless to say, my kiln was ruined.  She had the kiln guy come, and it never worked like it did before.  I can not understand putting food in a place where chemical reactions take place!
The event gave many families a good Thanksgiving day story, and is always mentioned at senior banquets and reunions!  

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!